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You don’t have to read this I’m just venting since I got no one to vent to

All my friends love having an older brother because they always take care of the younger siblings. No matter what the situation is, whether is a good or bad. The older brother is always there to support the younger ones. Not only that but they would sacrifice their own needs and make sure the younger siblings are in best condition. Are they being fed correctly? Is the clothes to small? Are they bored? Should I tease them? Are they hanging out with the right group? What kind of guy/girl is he/she dating? This what older brother are always thinking. At times they can be hateful but when you need them they are always there. Unfortunately not all older brothers are like that. Every time I go out with my brother the ask me” how old is you little brother?” Or “why is your little brother so quiet?”…..what can I say I’ve been watching over him the day I started pre school. I’m on my last four years college. Why is the little sister taking care of the older one? …it all started the day when my dad was leaving for work. As usual I would help him pack his lunch and see him off to work. As he was leaving he turns and says” daughter, watch over the house, don’t open the door for anybody even if its me, if someone calls say I’m busy, also make sure you feed your brother and little sister, also watch over them.” I will remember this til the day I die. Every since then I’ve acted as the older sister, but it was hard since my brother and I never got along since infant times. We were like fire and water… once we show our face to each other we declared war. But a couple years back from now I decided to let go and try to along with him. By doing so I put down my pride, spoiled him, agreed to everything he says, just as long he was happy….I mean he is my only brother. And since I sacrificed my needs for him we got along better, we got really close and I finally thought maybe after this I would finally have a real older brother. But ever since I introduced him the my workplace his attitude changes something like” I got money, I can do things on my own, I don’t need her, let’s shove her away” and since then we get into arguement over spilt milk. Supposedly he held in all the “annoyance” I gave him and blew up when he earned money. And so now we are back to step one…arguing. here’s the one thing I forgot to mention. I was warned to not get to close to him because when he is helpless he will follow you but when he can find something to support him he kicks you to the curb. I was well warned but decided if he does do that its my loss but I still want an older brother…because I chose to ignore the warning signs I just am now sitting on the curb hurt. But one thing for sure is I don’t regret it. Why? well what can I say we run on the same blood. So now that I’m on the curb…now what? Well I’m tired of being the older sister an sucking up to a heartless selfish person. So I don’t care anymore I’ve ruined 17 years of my life dreaming of an older brother. He didn’t do anything for me so I will no longer do anything for him. I always thought ..no matter how bad you fall even if your friends don’t catch you, you can always depend on your family….I’m finally letting go. If you don’t want the role of an older brother and I don’t need it anymore. All my friends love having an older brother because they always take care of the younger siblings. No matter what the situation is, whether is a good or bad. The older brother is always there to support the younger ones. Not only that but they would sacrifice their own needs and make sure the younger siblings are in best condition. Are they being fed correctly? Is the clothes to small? Are they bored? Should I tease them? Are they hanging out with the right group? What kind of guy/girl is he/she dating? This what older brother are always thinking. At times they can be hateful but when you need them they are always there. Unfortunately not all older brothers are like that. Every time I go out with my brother the ask me” how old is you little brother?” Or “why is your little brother so quiet?”…..what can I say I’ve been watching over him the day I started pre school. I’m on my last four years college. Why is the little sister taking care of the older one? …it all started the day when my dad was leaving for work. As usual I would help him pack his lunch and see him off to work. As he was leaving he turns and says” daughter, watch over the house, don’t open the door for anybody even if its me, if someone calls say I’m busy, also make sure you feed your brother and little sister, also watch over them.” I will remember this til the day I die. Every since then I’ve acted as the older sister, but it was hard since my brother and I never got along since infant times. We were like fire and water… once we show our face to each other we declared war. But a couple years back from now I decided to let go and try to along with him. By doing so I put down my pride, spoiled him, agreed to everything he says, just as long he was happy….I mean he is my only brother. And since I sacrificed my needs for him we got along better, we got really close and I finally thought maybe after this I would finally have a real older brother. But ever since I introduced him the my workplace his attitude changes something like” I got money, I can do things on my own, I don’t need her, let’s shove her away” and since then we get into arguement over spilt milk. Supposedly he held in all the “annoyance” I gave him and blew up when he earned money. And so now we are back to step one…arguing. here’s the one thing I forgot to mention. I was warned to not get to close to him because when he is helpless he will follow you but when he can find something to support him he kicks you to the curb. I was well warned but decided if he does do that its my loss but I still want an older brother…because I chose to ignore the warning signs I just am now sitting on the curb hurt. But one thing for sure is I don’t regret it. Why? well what can I say we run on the same blood. So now that I’m on the curb…now what? Well I’m tired of being the older sister an sucking up to a heartless selfish person. So I don’t care anymore I’ve ruined 17 years of my life dreaming of an older brother. He didn’t do anything for me so I will no longer do anything for him. I always thought ..no matter how bad you fall even if your friends don’t catch you, you can always depend on your family….I’m finally letting go. If you don’t want the role of an older brother and I don’t need it anymore. I just acted as if you never existed. Leave the family or we will leave you. With you in the family there was never happiness always hate and suffering. I will just act as if you never existed. Leave the family or we will leave you. You always complain how much we are a bother, how we are not smart enough for you, and that you don’t need us. Well hers something you should without mom and dad your lazy ass will not be here, if it wasn’t for them working with the blood,sweat, and tears, you would not be this healthy, if they didn’t send you to school you would not have the knowledge you have today, if they didn’t love you, you would be dead or living under someone elses roof…there is so much more but if I continue when will I ever end. Give mom and dad the respect they should have. Because unlike your siblings that have given up on you, mom and dad are still trying. I still love you but I can’t take it anymore.

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